Suffering from a lack of privacy has me reaching for the Senokot. It reminds me of when I was suffering from the same affliction last year when on holiday in France. The three of us queued up at the very busy pharmacy, me thinking 'I hope I don't get the guy. 'Bonjour monsieur. Avez vous quelquechose pour la constipation s'il vous plait?' He rattled off something in French to which I smiled and nodded before scarpering. About two minutes later a thought took hold like a shockwave. The French are quite partial for some reason to taking medication up their bottoms. I ripped open the pack and the diagrams said all I needed to know. In the interests of the readers' sensibilities I shall cut to the end. It worked.
They are just sealing off the toilet block now as we whistle nonchalantly making our exit.